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  HALF-A-MINDERS AND GONNA-DOERS

  Do you know someone who got cooked in the squat? Do you know someone who is “gonna do” something just as soon as the kids get out of school or the kids get back in school? Perhaps they will do it as soon as “cold weather gets here” or “cold weather is over.” Other excuses range from “when Christmas arrives or Christmas is over, John fixes the car, paints the house, cuts the grass, etc.” In a nutshell, those who make a list of “external” changes that must be met before they take “internal” action will always end up getting “cooked in the squat.”

  Do you know anyone who has “half-a-mind” to lose some weight, go back to school, take a public speaking course, beautify the lawn, get active in church or community affairs, etc.? Unfortunately, both the “half-a-minders” and the “gonna-doers,” the people who wait until everything is “just right” before they do anything, will never do it. Those who wait until all the lights are on green before starting will never leave home. They are the “half-a-minders” and the “gonna-doers,” which means they are “never-doers” and, as I say, they get cooked in the squat.

  Chances are excellent that on occasion you have said to someone that you were going to do a certain task, embark on a course of progress and development, or begin to do more things just as soon as you “get around to it.” Since I encounter so many people who fit this position, and since I don’t want a reader of my book to “get cooked in the squat,” I utilize something that is extremely effective. My business card is round. On one side is my name, address, and phone number. The other side has the word “TUIT” in large letters. Since the card is round and it is a Tuit, that makes it “a Round Tuit.” Later in the book I will tell you how to get a Round Tuit. (And I guarantee that I will get around to telling you how to get a Round Tuit, so keep reading.)

  When you get your “Round Tuit,” keep it with you at all times. And when someone asks you to do something you would normally promise to do as soon as you “get around to it,” you will be reminded that you already have your “Round Tuit,” so you can go ahead and do it.

  IT JUST ISN’T SO

  Throughout this book I’m going to completely refute the idea that you have to take advantage of people, abuse them, and be dishonest to be successful. As a matter of fact, I’m going to prove beyond any reasonable doubt that the only way you can really be successful in all areas of your life is to be completely honest with yourself and your fellow man. I will further establish that you can have everything in life you want, if you will just help enough other people get what they want. This is true whether you are a salesman, doctor, father, mother, businessman or woman, student, minister, mechanic, or even an elected government official.

  This story will help you understand that it’s not just what you have in your head that counts.

  THE BALLOON SALESMAN

  Several years ago, a balloon salesman was selling balloons on the streets of New York City. When business got a little slow, he would release a balloon. As it floated into the air, a fresh crowd of buyers would gather and his business would pick up for a few minutes. He alternated the colors, first releasing a white one, then a red one, and later a yellow one. After a time, a little African American boy tugged on his coat sleeve, looked the balloon salesman in the eye, and asked a penetrating question. “Mister, if you released a black balloon, would it go up?” The balloon salesman looked at the little boy and with compassion, wisdom and understanding said, “Son, it’s what’s inside those balloons that makes them go up.”

  The little boy was fortunate indeed to encounter a man who could see with more than just his eyes. With good eyes you can see to run or walk, work or play. The person who can see with his heart and his eyes can also reach out and touch the spirit within another human being and reveal the good that lies in him. Yes, the balloon salesman was “right.” I’m also “right” when I tell you that it’s what’s inside you that will make you go up.

  Now, my friends, whether you are in Decision Valley or on Hesitation Hill, or even if your career or personal life is already in high gear, let me urge you to fasten your seat belt, because you are on a trip to the top. It’s an exciting trip, with more suspense than an Alfred Hitchcock thriller, more action than a John Wayne western, more drama than a Shakespearean play, and more fun than a three-ring circus. It’s immersed in love, filled with laughter, and offers more true rewards than King Solomon’s Mines. In short, this book is actually the Owner’s Manual for your Future.

  It’s true, you can get what you want instead of having to want what you have. Success is easy after you believe. But first you must believe. So stick around and keep reading. You’re on your way to believing, which simply means, you’re on your way.

  SEGMENT TWO

  Your Self-Image

  Purpose:

  I. To demonstrate the importance of a healthy self-image.

  II. To identify the causes of a poor self-image.

  III. To reveal the manifestations of a poor self-image.

  IV. To give you fifteen methods for improving your self-image.

  V. To encourage you to choose, and then remain on, the road to a healthy self-image.

  CHAPTER 3

  The Thieves

  GENUINE OR COUNTERFEIT

  The scene is a small neighborhood grocery store and the year is 1887. A distinguished-looking gentleman in his late fifties or early sixties is buying some turnip greens. He hands the clerk a twenty-dollar bill and waits for his change. The clerk accepts the money and starts to place it in the cash drawer as she makes change. However, she notices that the ink is coming off on her fingers, which are still wet from handling the turnip greens. She is shocked and pauses to consider what to do. After an instant of wrestling with the problem, she makes a decision. This is Emmanual Ninger, a long-time friend, neighbor, and customer. Surely he would not give her a bill that was anything less than genuine, so she gave him the change and he left.

  Later, she had some second thoughts because twenty dollars was a lot of money in 1887. She sent for the police. One policeman was confident the twenty-dollar bill was the genuine article. The other was puzzled about the ink that rubbed off. Finally, curiosity combined with responsibility forced them to obtain a warrant to search Mr. Ninger’s home.

  In the attic they found the facilities for reproducing twenty-dollar bills. As a matter of fact, they found a twenty-dollar bill in the process of being printed. They also found three portraits Emmanual Ninger had painted. Ninger was an artist, and a good one. He was so good, he was hand-painting those twenty-dollar bills, meticulously, stroke by stroke. He applied the master’s touch so skillfully he was able to fool everyone until a quirk of fate in the form of the wet hands of a grocery store clerk exposed him.

  After his arrest, his portraits were sold at public auction for $16,000—over $5,000 each. The irony of the story is, it took Emmanual Ninger almost exactly the same length of time to paint a twenty-dollar bill as it took him to paint a $5,000 portrait. Yes, this brilliant and talented man was a thief in every sense of the word. Tragically, the person he stole the most from was Emmanual Ninger. Not only could he have been a wealthy man if he had legitimately marketed his ability, but he could have brought much joy and many benefits to his fellow man in the process. He was another in the endless list of thieves who steal from themselves when they try to steal from others.

  THIS THIEF WAS A SNOB

  A second thief I would like to tell you about is a man named Arthur Barry. He, too, was an unusual thief. He was a jewel thief who operated during the “roaring twenties.” Barry gained an international reputation as probably the outstanding jewel thief of all time. Not only was he a successful jewel thief, he was also a connoisseur of the arts. As a matter of fact, he had become a snob and would not steal from just anyone— not Arthur Barry. Not only must his “prospects” have money and jewels in order for him to come calling, but their names must also be listed in the top echelons of society. It became somewhat of a statu
s symbol to have been called on and robbed by this “gentleman thief.” This feeling, I hasten to add, caused the police force a great deal of embarrassment.

  One night, Barry was caught during a robbery and shot three times. With bullets in his body, splinters of glass in his eyes and suffering excruciating pain, he made a not too unexpected statement: “I’m not going to do this anymore.” Miraculously, he escaped and for the next three years he remained outside the prison. Then, a jealous woman turned him in and Barry served an eighteen-year sentence. When he was released, he kept his word. He didn’t go back to the life of a jewel thief. As a matter of fact, he settled in a small New England town and lived a model life. Local citizens honored him by making him the commander of a local veterans’ organization.

  Eventually, however, word leaked out that Arthur Barry, the famous jewel thief, was in their midst. Reporters from all over the country came to the little town to interview him. They asked him a number of questions, and finally one young reporter got to the very crux of the matter when he asked the most penetrating question of all. “Mr. Barry,” he queried, “you stole from a lot of wealthy people during your years as a thief, but I’m curious to know if you remember the one from whom you stole the most?” Barry, without a moment’s hesitation said, “That’s easy. The man from whom I stole the most was Arthur Barry. I could have been a successful businessman, a baron on Wall Street and a contributing member to society, but instead I chose the life of a thief, and spent two-thirds of my adult life behind prison bars.” Yes, Arthur Barry was truly the thief who stole from himself.

  YOU KNOW THIS THIEF

  A third thief I would like to talk about is obviously you. I’m going to call you a thief because any person who does not believe in himself and fully utilize his ability is literally stealing from himself, from his loved ones, and, in the process, because of reduced productivity, he also steals from society. Since no one would knowingly steal from himself or herself, it’s obvious that those who steal from themselves do it unwittingly. Nevertheless, the crime is still serious because the loss is just as great as if it were deliberately done.

  So the question is obvious: Are you ready to quit stealing from yourself? I’m optimistic enough to believe that you have started your climb to the top. For you and many others, this book will provide the motivation, inspiration, and knowledge to take you a long way. Let me warn you, however, your education in this field isn’t complete the minute you finish this book. Your body needs nutritional food every day and your mind needs mental nourishment just as often, so keep reading and soon, when you look into the mirror, you will be looking into the eyes of an ex-thief.

  THE TELEPHONE RINGS

  I’m personally convinced that a healthy self-image is the starting point—the first and most important step to reaching our objectives. After all, if we don’t start, it’s certain we can’t arrive. Perhaps this analogy will sell you on that concept.

  Let’s play a game for a moment. Your telephone rings and the voice at the other end says, “Friend, don’t be disturbed. I don’t want to borrow any money and I have no favors to ask. I just thought I would call and tell you that I think you’re one of the nicest persons who ever drew a breath of air. You are an asset to your profession and a credit to your community. You’re the kind of person I like to be with because every time I’m around you, I feel inspired and motivated to do a better job. I wish I could see you every day because you motivate me to be my best self. That’s all I wanted to say, Friend. Look forward to seeing you soon.” Now, if a close friend called you and said those things to you, what kind of day would you have? Remember, you know the words are sincere because they are coming from a close friend.

  If you were a doctor, would you be a better doctor? If you were a teacher, would you be a better teacher? If you were a salesman, would you be a better salesman? If you were a mother, would you be a better mother? If you were a father, would you be a better father? If you were a coach, would you be a better coach? If you were an athlete, would you be a better athlete? If you were a student, would you be a better student? Would you be better? Regardless of who you are or what you do, you know in your own mind you wouldn’t only be better at your job, but you would be happier, wouldn’t you? (Say yes.)

  One other question arises at this point. In light of the previous conversation, how much more would you know about being a doctor? Or a salesperson? A lawyer? A coach? A student? An athlete? How much more would you know if you had gotten that phone call? The answer obviously is you wouldn’t know any more. Still, in your own mind you know you would be better and happier in your job. The reason is simple. You’ve had a change of image. You would say, “I’m an asset to my community and a credit to my profession. That old boy said so, and he is one more smart cookie.” You wouldn’t argue with him for one single moment. You would see yourself in a different light. Your self-image would change and at that instant an interesting thing happens. Your confidence goes up and when your confidence goes up, your competence goes up at the same time. Simply stated, it means that when your image improves, your performance improves.

  Since you know what this kind of phone call would do for you, why don’t you do the same thing for someone else? Why don’t you put this book down and pick up the telephone (unless it is 2:00 a.m., or some other ridiculous hour). Call that person you sincerely like and respect, and tell him or her how much you appreciate who they are, what they do, and how much they mean and have meant to you. The person you call will be appreciative and you will feel good about it. Significantly, you will like yourself better as a result of helping to build up someone else. More on this later.

  The next story—straight out of life—clearly demonstrates the importance of a healthy self-image and what happens when your self-image changes.

  FROM “DUNCE” TO GENIUS IN ONE EASY STEP

  When Victor Seribriakoff was fifteen, his teacher told him he would never finish school and that he should drop out and learn a trade. Victor took the advice and for the next seventeen years he was an itinerant doing a variety of odd jobs. He had been told he was a “dunce,” and for seventeen years he acted like one. When he was 32 years old, an amazing transformation took place. An evaluation revealed that he was a genius with an IQ of 161. Guess what? That’s right, he started acting like a genius. Since that time he has written books, secured a number of patents, and has become a successful businessman. Perhaps the most significant event for the former dropout was his election as chairman of the International Mensa Society. The Mensa Society has only one membership qualification, a minimum IQ of 140.

  The story of Victor Seribriakoff makes you wonder how many geniuses we have wandering around acting like dunces because someone told them they weren’t too bright. Obviously, Victor did not suddenly acquire a tremendous amount of additional knowledge. He did suddenly acquire a tremendous amount of added confidence. The result was he instantly became more effective and more productive. When he saw himself differently, he started acting differently. He started expecting, and getting, different results. Ah yes, as a man thinketh . . . .

  JUST HOW IMPORTANT IS YOUR SELF-IMAGE?

  Mildred Newman and Dr. Bernard Berkowitz in their book How to Be Your Own Best Friend ask a penetrating question: “If we cannot love ourselves, where will we draw our love for anyone else?” You can’t give away something you don’t have. The Bible says, “Love thy neighbor as thyself.”

  Is self-image important? Dorothy Jongeward and Muriel James wrote a marvelous book entitled Born to Win. They point out that man was born to win, but throughout a lifetime, as a result of our negative society, he is conditioned to lose. They, too, stress that a healthy self-image is critical in the success parade.

  You cannot consistently perform in a manner that is inconsistent with the way you see yourself. Your self-image will lead you to the top of the stairway or put you on an escalator to the basement. See yourself as a capable, deserving person and you will be, do, and have. See yourself as incapable
and nondeserving and you have not. Fortunately, regardless of how you have seen yourself in the past, you now have the motivation, method, and capacity to change, and change for the better. Of all the gifts our Creator gives us, surely the gift of choosing the way we wish to be is one of the greatest.

  As we delve into our self-image, let’s remember that the mind completes whatever picture we put in it. For example, a plank 12 inches wide lying on the floor would be easy to walk. Place the same plank between two ten story buildings and “walking the plank” is a different matter. You “see” yourself easily and safely walking the plank on the floor. You “see” yourself falling from the plank stretched between the buildings. Since the mind completes the picture you paint in it, your fears are quite real. Many times a golfer will knock a ball into a lake or hit it out of bounds and then step back with the comment, “I knew I was going to do that.” His mind painted a picture and his body completed the action. On the positive side, the successful golfer knows he must “see” the ball going in the cup before he strokes it. The good hitter in baseball “sees” the ball dropping in for a base hit before he swings at the ball, and the successful salesman “sees” the customer buying before he makes the calls. Michelangelo clearly saw the mighty Moses in that block of marble before he struck the first blow.